dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
