First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
