this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize
