I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
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