i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
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