I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
