Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
it was like having sex with a tree stump
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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