I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
The struggles of a small town man whore
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Randomize
