Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
You dont lie about slip and slides
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize