chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
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