she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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