Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
