he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
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