i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
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