scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize