I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
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