She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize
