So drunk, too bad you don't want this
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
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I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
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Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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