he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
