Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
