if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
