thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize