Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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