Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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