My nipple is on Facebook.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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