i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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