Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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