I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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