8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Randomize
