Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
