Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
