I need help removing her.
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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