just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Randomize
