We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
