Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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