I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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