no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
