This is not my ceiling
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize