I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
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