Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
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