I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Randomize