Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Randomize
