This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
