you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
