Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
