I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
