Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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