is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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