seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Randomize
