Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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