True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Randomize
