i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
