he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Randomize
